Lima

Surviving the VA: A Veteran’s Story

My name is Lima. I began working with Mike Coonan, LMSW, ACSW, BCD, because the VA turned me away. He brought my wife into the process.   This is my story.

I was born and raised in Michigan. Before the military, I had a good upbringing and learned early how to work hard. I was social, played sports, and liked working with my hands. When I was seventeen, I bought a small garage and started fixing cars on my own. I worked steadily, paid my bills, and supported myself. I expected to live a normal, productive life. I was independent and motivated long before I wore a uniform.

That changed when I was drafted. I served as an infantryman in Vietnam.  I was in Bravo Company, 1st Battalion, 14th Infantry, 3rd Brigade, 4th Infantry Division. I was an Infantryman in a combat platoon, later serving as a squad leader on small reconnaissance patrols. We covered primarily in the Central Highlands.  Our Operations were near the Cambodian border and spent most of a year in combat. We were hit by mortars and rockets and fought the enemy up close. I saw men wounded and dying. I led small reconnaissance patrols with no support, moving through areas where the enemy could be just feet away. Fear was part of every day. Staying alive depended on being alert and hoping luck stayed with you. One experience has stayed with me all these years. During a heavy fight, a fellow squad leader was badly wounded. Under fire, I tried to drag him to safety, but I couldn’t move him. The fighting got worse, and my unit was reassigned when it ended. I never found out if he lived or died. Not knowing that has weighed on me for decades.

When I came home, I wasn’t the same person. I had trouble sleeping, stayed on edge, and got angry easily. Loud noises startled me. I pulled away from people. I drank to cope with things I didn’t understand and couldn’t control. Over time, my mood swings, emotional distance, and untreated trauma cost me my first marriage. I kept working and staying busy, but inside, I was slowly falling apart.  For many years, I didn’t go to the VA for mental health care. Like a lot of combat veterans, I tried to handle it myself. I didn’t know how to ask for help, and I didn’t believe help would come even if I did. My symptoms only got worse as time went on.

It wasn’t until I had a full, independent mental health evaluation by a licensed clinical social worker (LMSW, ACSW, BCD) that my combat experiences and symptoms were really put together and understood. That evaluation showed that I have severe, long-standing combat-related mental health problems that affect my daily life in serious ways. The evaluator clearly recommended that I be seen by VA psychiatry for proper diagnosis and medication management because of how severe and long-lasting my symptoms are. Based on that recommendation, I went to the VA seeking psychiatric care for the first time. Instead of being evaluated by a psychiatrist, I was redirected away from psychiatry and pushed into other pathways that didn’t address what I was dealing with. Despite clear clinical findings showing I needed psychiatric care, I was not given timely access to a psychiatrist. The experience felt dismissive and disrespectful, like my service and years of suffering didn’t matter.

My evaluation documented severe sleep problems, intrusive memories, constant tension, survivor’s guilt, depression, anxiety, trouble concentrating, social withdrawal, and using alcohol just to get through the day. These are not mild problems. They are serious and long-standing. Therapy alone was not enough without medical help to stabilize my symptoms. What I experienced doesn’t seem to be a one-time mistake. I am learning that many veterans with severe, combat-related mental illness are delayed or blocked from seeing a psychiatrist, even when the need is clear. These delays increase risk, extend suffering, and work against suicide-prevention efforts.

From what I’ve lived through, my case reflects problems that have been identified before: gatekeeping, and redirected when risk is high, lack of urgency, and decisions that don’t match the severity of the condition. These failures don’t just affect paperwork. They affect real people and real families, including mine. I survived combat. I lost a marriage to untreated trauma. I waited decades before asking for help. When I finally did, after a thorough evaluation, I was turned away from the care I was told I needed. Despite the VA's effort to get me properly, I completed the C&P process and was awarded 100% disability benefit.

Mental Health/ Military History Psychosocial Assessment was written by Mike Coonan, LMSW, ACSW, BCD. 

His treating VA psychiatrist provided the Expert Medical Opinion. 

Both were prepared and completed at no cost to the veteran.

Both made a significant impact on his VA Disability Compensation Evaluation and Decision.